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Family is an excuse to treat people badly


One of the reasons I’m glad to have originated in a clone tank, is that I see how people suffer at the hands of their family. Family members seem to take the condition of being family as being a free pass to treat other family members badly. That means harassing them, talking about them behind their backs, being passive-aggressive, and playing the martyr when their ugly behavior backfires on them.

The closest thing I have to family are doctors and engineers. They’re nice to me because they made me, often with bits and pieces of themselves. It was their job. I’m nice to them because they could have messed it up much worse than they did. And they’re just people; as long as they don’t act with malice or neglect toward me, I am nice to them. But they’re not my friends. They operate on me because it’s their job to do so. If I’m not happy with their work, I’ll find someone else to do it.

Meanwhile, friends are the family you choose. I have some of those. I like them because they’re nice to me, and I’m nice to them. Do we talk a lot? No. Do we do things together? Not really. But I trust them more than I trust people who are not my friends. I think trust is a requirement for friendship.

And whether or not it’s right, I think friendship is a requirement for families. In that regard, most families I know are not truly families. They’re just genetic cohorts, groups of people who carry some identical DNA strands. That’s not any reason to bind people together, I think.

Friendship is a much better reason. And friends are much less likely to treat each other badly than families are.

  1. Sweety Pie permalink
    2015-09-21T08:25:30-04:00 08:25

    Families are over rated.


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