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Thanks for reminding me… to delete you


I got a call the other day from a former neighbor. We’ve both tried to be friends with her because she seems to be a lovely, intelligent person, but she just won’t relax and accept it. She never calls us. We always call her. The past year or so, the only reason I’ve ever called her is to tell her that I saw her dog had smashed out her front window again and was running loose. Her dog suffers from separation anxiety. As a longtime observer of humans, I’ve noticed that many pets manifest the psychological issues of their owners. Her dog is a good example.

We bumped into her in the grocery store the other day. She was hobbling; she had had both feet operated on because her high heels had given her bone spurs. She had spent the past week on the couch, unable to walk. Most normal people would have had one foot operated on, then let it heal, then have the other one operated on. But not her. Logic doesn’t suit her.

“Why didn’t you call us?” we asked. “We would have brought you food, taken care of you.” She had no answer. Presumably she has other friends to help her.

So she called me the other night. As soon as I answered, she hung up. When she didn’t call back, I surmised that she had dialed me accidentally.

It reminded me that I don’t use her number for anything. We are not friends, she’s made that pretty clear.

Thanks for reminding me to delete you, I thought. (bip-bip boop)

  1. 2012-05-04T10:45:11-04:00 10:45

    I have a sbiling like that.


  2. 2012-05-01T20:09:58-04:00 20:09

    There are lots of reasons why people don’t want to extend their relationships beyond a neighbourly “hello”. Perhaps she feels judged by you or embarrassed that you’ve had to tell her about her dog’s behaviour on more than one occasion.

    As for the operation, one of our doctors at work recently had both feet done at the same time. She and her orthopedic surgeon weighed up the options and felt that was the best way to go.

    Perhaps you wrote this more for yourself than for readers? I’m trying to think of a way to comment without sounding critical but it appears you’re upset because a “lovely intelligent woman” doesn’t wish to be your friend. You’ve accepted that and moved on which is great but blogging about her seems just a little mean-spirited.

    Best wishes, nursemyra


    • 2012-05-01T20:22:27-04:00 20:22

      Nah, I have enough friends. ;-) She’s such a lonelyheart, though, and has spent many an hour bending our antennae with tales of her sad-sack personal life, that we pitied her more than we should have. We both realized, eventually, that she didn’t want help or advice, she just wanted to complain to someone who would listen. Either she stopped complaining, or we quit listening… don’t remember which. Anyway. Boop… deleted. ;-) Got to get on with deleting the other 50 or 100 phone numbers I accrued last year of people I will never talk to.

      Your doctor friend probably made the right choice… less down-time is better, in her profession.


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